Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Tiny Bob

A tiny Bob Marley look-alike walked into the ED the other night after being 'cut' by his girlfriend. Tiny Bob was 21 and had dreadlocks and the whole look going on. He wasn't badly hurt but he was very worried about his rep with his home-slices. He also didn't want me to sew up his cuts or stick him with needles.

In the meantime the police came into the room and Tiny Bob tried to be the good guy and take all the blame for the cuts he received at the hands of the angry girlfriend. He told them that he hit her first and she was just trying to defend herself. This story was inconsistent with the wounds he received (for one he was stabbed in the back of the thigh, no doubt as he was running away), but he stuck to it. The result was that he got arrested for domestic assault, and with the record he already had, he will probably go to prison.

The second result was that his girlfriend was also arrested for assault with a deadly weapon after she showed up in the ED with a small cut to her finger. Good thinking Tiny Bob.

The coup-de-grace for the interaction took place as I was sewing up his four lacerations...

Me: "So, do you like Bob Marley?"
Patient: "Who's dat?"
Me: "You know, the famous reggae singer?"
Patient: "What's dat?"
Me: "You know, Jamaican music?"
Patient: "Jamaica??"
Me: "Are you a rastafarian?"
Patient: " What's dat?"
Me: "You know, the religion some Jamaicans have... that's where dreadlocks come from."
Patient: "Dreadlocks???"
Me: "Yeah, the way you have your hair, it's called dreadlocks..."
Patient: "Huh?"
Me: "I guess you just like your hair in that style, huh?"
Patient: "Yeah."

Even though Tiny Bob was didn't know Bob Marley from Adam, was not a fan of reggae, was not a rastafarian, and didn't know what dreadlocks are, I'm fairly sure he smokes a lot of pot.


  1. I just found your blog via Medblog Addict. Awesome stuff.

  2. muchas gracias, senor scalpel.

  3. I would like to take this opportunity to say that this is my fave. blog post of all time, from any blog...

    I laugh everytime I read it.

  4. Hahaha, just for the mental image of a "tiny Bob Marley look alike", I thank you!