I am able to make a diagnosis with 100% accuracy without looking at someone's biopsy. Here's how it works:
Me: (to Dr. O, oncologist in hallway) Hi Jim.
Dr. O: Hey, I have a patient for you. She's the sweetest lady, about 60, donates all her time to the church, is a loving wife and parent, has donated both her kidneys to strangers, walks on water, and has found a cure for AIDS. She has a little spot on her lungs I think is nothing. We are going to biopsy...
Me: Stop. Tell her she is going to die miserably. That spot is incurable and aggressive cancer. Tell her she will die weeks before her oldest daughter's wedding.
Dr. O: How did you know her daughter was getting married?
Me: Walk away before I start to weep uncontrollably.
Yes... I am magic.
Monday, March 26, 2007
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Ah, do I detect a link between pathology and emergency medicine? Yes! I do! See this post...
ReplyDeletehttp://docsontheweb.blogspot.com/2006/10/be-mean-and-nasty.html
yeah... I realize it's not the most original observation, but f**k if it doesn't happen every f**king day.
ReplyDeleteToo true..
ReplyDeleteJust remember that since those patients suffered so much here on earth, their heaven will be that much greater!
The dirtbags who live for themselves and indulge in every earthly pleasure... they've already had their "heaven".. they'll get whats coming to them one day
Awesome. Love what you are learning and becoming.
ReplyDeleteVery interesting reading. Thank's for sharing with us