Family Möbius Strip

911's peachy flow chart has motivated me to tell a story that can only be appreciated through graphic representation.

Some definitions of the symbols in the above diagram:

*square = male, circle = female

*double lines mean consanguineous relationship

For the non-geneticists, let me describe in prose what you are seeing: Billy Bob and Bobby Sue were 1st cousins and had a daughter and son. That brother and sister loved each other, or at least had nothing better to do after bowling league, and had sex. This act of love produced a daughter who, since she looked like her mom / aunt, fired up the loins of dad / uncle. They consummated this forbidden love in the back of a pickup truck in the Wal-Mart parking lot. This moment of beauty and caring produced yet another daughter. This was my patient (bottom circle).

Now for the quiz:

1. What state were they from? (1 point - too easy)

2. What type of disease did my patient have? (5 points)

3. What is an "FLK"? (2 points)

4. Aside from being an FLK, what was the main symptom in this infant? (5 points)

5. What was the father / uncle / grandfather's approximate tooth to tattoo ratio? (2 points)

6. What does a 12 year old girl from the south say after she's had sex for the first time? (5 points)

7. What percent shared genes, on average, would my patient and her father have? (10 points)

0 points: You are this patient.

1-10 points: You are the father.

11-20 points: Not bad. Consider rehabbing your double-wide trailer.

21-30 points: You are a sick fuck. Get a life.

>30 points: You are a genius! Unfortunately, you are also a cheating douche since 30 is the max score. Go hang out with Marion Jones.

Answers to follow.