Friday, December 04, 2009

I Do Not Miss This



I believe I have heard this EXACT patient complaint at least fifty times (thanks "A").

10 comments:

  1. 911, I thought for sure you had either been the creator of that or had surely already seen it.

    -SCNS

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  2. Also thought you would have seen this before, it is AWESOME. Every FF/Medic I send it to says, "I know her!"

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  3. I have seen a few of these, but this is by far the best.

    We've piked her up a few times I am sure.

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  4. I'll trade this "seizure" patient for the one I've been seeing lately!

    She's a pretty high school cheerleader with hyperactive parents who drag her to the ER 3 times a week with the most poorly orchestrated fake seizures you've ever seen. They only stop when you pinch her trapezius (and she yells "ouch"), or her parents leave the room.

    All of the docs who have suggested that the "seizures" aren't real are being reported to the State Medical Board by these crazy people who are certain that their princess is having seizures because they looked it up on the internet!

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  5. "I am allergic to non-narcotics, non-fat foods and employment."

    Funny.

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  6. One could also add: I spilled my cough syrup (narcotic-based of course), my pills fell down the toilet, and my house was broken into and the police report shows that I had my vicodin/xanax/percocet/soma stolen. Oh, and how about the one who says the only thing that helps her pain is "lor, lor, lor, I can't remember the name of the pill."

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  7. toradol????How can anyone not love that one.

    Actually, I have a question too. You told me that Toradol is like prescription Ibuprofen right? (I was still high as a kite on the other crap when I talked to you about this so I may remember wrong). Ibuprofen makes me puke when I take it...so I don't take it, obviously. Does toradol just not make me puke because it is through an iv and doesn't irritate my stomach?

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  8. Let me take a wild guess.

    She voted for Obama.

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  9. She expected Obama to be the ER doc...

    "Yes we can."

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  10. "I am allergic to...the direction 'east'".

    snort...

    I especially like the PlayMobil arms, and that this exam is apparently being done in a Seven-Eleven.

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