Monday, July 06, 2009

Obama Declares Oxygen a "Right"


In a long overdue move the President of the United States of America, Barack Obama, has declared Oxygen for all a 'right' and has therefore pronounced it 'free'. The free oxygen will be funded by 'spreading money around' and taxing people who use too much of it. Credits will be given to citizens who trap their flatus in a jar or balloon and deliver it to the Central Oxygen Committee offices to produce clean burning fuel for hybrid human-flatus vehicles. Economists working with the administration say that the increased demand for oxygen will produce an increased supply much as playing powerball with your "special numbers" will win the jackpot.

8 comments:

  1. I used to read this blog because of the experience and knowledge that lay behind discussion of interesting topics from the frontlines of medicine.

    I now stop reading this blog due to a feeling of distaste similar to what I feel for patients who insist immunizations cause autism.

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  2. lighten' up francis and keep working on that english!

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  3. Easy up Anonymous, don't know why people get upset about this blog being an amateur politics site from a doc's perspective. I just looked back over the last 50 and only 2 were pure medical, non opinion.

    Get with it, y'alls. Sit back and enjoy or don't, your internet.

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  4. ah, wisdom from a paramedic colleague. dave is right, and since O is about to nationalize our profession it's kinda germane and all, plus it's fun. anonymous, you may, at any time, start your own blog and stuff.

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  5. Look here jackass hero-worshipping cult of personality obamas dip shits. I can understand in the 30's Big Daddy Roosevelt pulling the wool over the eyes of some midwest farmer, who just got a radio, listening to the fireside chats. But in this day and age, there is absolutely no reason, other than blind stupidity and rose colored glasses, that we should let turbo-charged resurrections of the New Deal drag us into another depression and socialist ideas. If you haven't read FDR's Folly and Atlas Shrugged, don't comment based on what your elbow patch wearing tweed coat hippie history prof told you after smoking another bowl. By the way, the Nazis took power from the LEFT, not the right, hence the NATIONAL SOCIALIST GERMAN WORKERS PARTY.

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  6. Since the Anon isn't reading the blog anymore, he/she won't be around to read this:

    PUTZ!

    Good riddance!

    Hey 911, of all of the people who threaten to "quit reading" and "never come back to this site again", how many have you lost a wink of sleep over?

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  7. actually, i cry a bit on the inside every time. i don't know how much more i can take. 'scuse me, gotta go take care of another chest pain patient who can not afford his $4 a month blood pressure medicine and was very happy to show me his new $100 cowboy boots.

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  8. Maybe my bit of political satire will also be amusing.

    Obama Explains Millionaire Grants (smile)

    = = = = = = =
    Future News:

    It is just weeks after Barack Obama won the 2012 election to his second term as President. White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs provided some details today about President Obama's campaign promise to "make 95% of all citizens a millionaire".

    Participants must earn less than $50,000, with a net worth less than $50,000. They must be a legal resident for 3 years at the time of the grant. Illegal status will incur a $10,000 penalty in exchange for immediate citizenship. Gibbs said: "It just seems fair not to spoil such a happy event because of a technicality".

    (continued at link)
    = = = = = = =

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