Wednesday, September 16, 2009

The French


So my colleague Dr. 'Cat emailed me excitedly today. Seems he is buying a new car and it's from France. Yes, France, the purveyors of the Maginot Line and the once a week shower.

There's only one problem, dear 'Cat, how are you going to place the gun holder in the back window? Also, there is no option for wheel-spinners, curb-feelers, or those neat blue lights underneath.

Французы изобрели влагалище на колесах.

21 comments:

  1. Can't help but look at that car and think, no self-respecting guy is saying,"Hey, sign me up for one of those cars that looks like it was made by Mattel."

    Don't think the flat-tire look inspires much confidence either.

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  2. Yeek! Don't let him go clothes shopping while he's there.

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  3. Hey I'm from Misery..there's no foglights for frog gigging and where you gonna make meth in that thing?

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  4. I am going to use the car to penetrate the left wing movement and get deep inside the bowels of the underbelly of likes of Jimmy "I'm retarded" Carter and Kanye West. Once inside, I'll go in and out, and relay information to our side, hopfully digging up enough mud to expose their warts. Maybe I can even reach around to them and get them to see the error of their ways.

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  5. I for one, salute you for doing a bit of the old In-and-Out to the left. However, you should resist any temptation to get involved in a race in your French car, as during the final lap, when they wave the white flag, you will have to surrender:

    http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/formula_1/article6836959.ece

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  6. I wave my private parts at you Auntie!

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  7. now run away once more or we fire arrows into your heads and make castinets out of your testicles... ack, thhhhppppt.

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  8. Renault's French, eh? Even if Flav's not.

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  9. Hey now, I'm part French. There are plenty of great French things...Cheese, Art, Wine, Food...But I wouldn't be caught dead in that bloody thing.

    But yeah, pretty much anything made outside these categories are crap(also the French outside of France typically are superb people, as well as French Soldiers, met a group once on the tunnel train).

    No Ruskie sentence, Doc X?

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  10. It's an empty headed animal food trough wiper.

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  11. The French smell like a Gyro left on a sidewalk for 3 days, doused with Polo cologne.
    Won't be 20 years before Sharia law is enforced there so if you want to go and enjoy the wine, I'd go now.

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  12. ROFL SCat,
    can I have some of what y'all are high on tonight?
    -SCNS

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  13. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  14. oh amy,
    why the edit? i liked your first one.

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  15. Amy...are you REALLY a chick?? That whole African Hermaphrodite Sprinter things got me freaked out..
    EVERY REAL GIRL knows Malibu Marbi drove a hot Pink Convertible, I've, Umm I mean MY WIFE's got one still in the original packaging,
    It was French-Kiss Barbi that drove the Re-know
    Glad we set that straight,

    Frank

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  16. It looks like some kind of moon vehicle.

    Moon Rover.

    Weird.

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  17. The wheels are actually only flat on the bottom.

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  18. What 911? You mean the proximity-dependent penile invagination comment? Like the length of the schlong directly correlates to distance from the barbie car?

    Barbie car = the antithesis of the penis car.

    Yeah, I deleted the comment trying to be more grown-up.

    Full of fail...

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