Thursday, August 18, 2011
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Random thoughts from a few cantankerous American physicians. All contributors are board certified. Various specialties are represented here. I do not know where this will lead but hope it will at least be an enjoyable read. All of the names mentioned in this blog are pseudonyms, the ages have been changed, and in half the cases the gender as well. All photographs are published with patient consent or are digitally altered to preserve anonymity. Trust us, we're doctors.
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My thoughts and prayers to this man and all his brothers and sisters who are paying for our freedom with their blood and sweat
ReplyDeleteAgreed. We sit comfortably at home as these heroes do the real work.
ReplyDeleteMs1
I think its...
ReplyDelete"We sleep safely at night because rough men stand ready to visit violence on those who would do us harm"
Frank
Sigh! OK, you win, never argue with stupid people as you will be beaten by experience. I will refrain from trying to educate you despite the fact that Doc started it with his 'prayers to his imaginary friend'.
ReplyDeleteAnon., (if that is your real name), your MOM's stupid.
ReplyDeleteThe device in question was developed by a Russian ortho surgeon to regrow bone in blower up legs and such... A neato link can be found following...
www.ilizarov.org.uk/anim.htm
Of course we have renamed it for an American doc, but every few weeks he turns the screws and pulls the fracture apart and new bone is created in the new fracture site. Repeat until at length. Neat.
The Russ-kies have all sorts of cool thangs...
ReplyDeleteVodka, Tolstoy, Anna Kornikova.
and the Baddest Mo-Fo in the whole Sopranos Series had to be that Russian guy who got away after they thought he was dead..
and if wasn't for them inventing Radial Keratomy, which lead to the Lasik, Ophthalmologists would have to work alot harder to earn there millions..
Frank
Hey 911 Doc, yes Anon is my real name. In the UK we were using this bone extending framework 30 years ago. So USA 0, UK 1.
ReplyDeleteSigh, and then there's DRX.
ReplyDelete-SCRN
Pip pip cheerio and Brittania rules the waves. A sticky wicket but points to your side for a nicely played round. Do be careful with those riots old chap, and remember, never be rude to an Arab! And Winston S.C. (all hail) would punch you square in the nose and you would thank him for doing it because you know in your soul that you deserve it. Cheers an all that crap.
ReplyDeleteThis is awesome. Thanks 911. Are you involved with placing these things while working at the VA?
ReplyDeleteMs1
Annon,
ReplyDeleteSo howcome y'all cant figure out toothpaste???
and I believe its USA 2 Eng-a-land 0, alllthough we havent played in almost 200 years since y'all got relegated down to the minors. And thats not even mentioning 2 World Wars where we saved your limey asses and don't even get a "Vielen Dank".
Thats "Thank You" in German, which you'd be speakin if my Grandfather hadnt slaughtered 500 Krauts singlehandedly.
Seriously, he said his biggest fear was gettin shot with some English Homo behind him.
And your Queens Ugly, Prince Charles is a Sissy, Jaguars suck, and your biggest hero, Churchill was 1/2 American.
I think that about covers it.
OK Cate Blanchett's pretty hot.
Frank
You know...I met a few Brits in my travels lately...and they all are convinced we had little to nothing to do with winning the world wars?
ReplyDeleteGoddam limeys.
Ms1
Hey UK anon, I'm for leaving you guys on the other side of the pond to deal with your own problems. Once you guys spend a few years on your own, maybe you will get some necessary skills, or cease to exist. Whatever. I am tired of the lack of respect.
ReplyDelete-SCRN
UK Anon, that IS old technology, but we haven't had as much need for it in the US, because we shoot people that have the intent of blowing people up. So, yeah, we have more experience with trying to save people from bullet wounds, than blowed up legs.
ReplyDeleteAmericans that would be found on this site are not the sort of people that would allow pussies to walk freely through our cities and harm other citizens, or their property.
Please tell us about your Harry Potter Stealth Blamket that allows you to be invisible while your neighbor's homes and businesses are burned, or allow your great nation to make it illegal for decent citizens to put a metal mesh over their garden shed windows, because that may injure your vast class of burglars.
Do you have more experience with old equipment for fixing blown up legs, because you live in a place where you allow people to blow people up?
We just shoot the people that blow other people up. You might want to try that. In our country, we tend to kill our blower-uppers before they become a significant medical issue.
Best.
CJrun
CJrun, I am liking the cut of your jib more and more!! You go youngster!
ReplyDeleteanon 11:54 8/19/11
ReplyDeleteIf they are fighting for oil, where the h***is it? Oil supply hasn't improved, no one is getting all sorts of oil from these countries. I've known these men and women, and they are fighting for this country and its freedom, no matter what you may think. As for my praying for them, why do you feel that you have to insult my beliefs? You don't want to believe...that's your choice. No one insults you here for that. So why do you feel the need to insult us who do believe in a God?
Oh wow, so it's like that thing they did in "Gattaca" to make the guy taller? Did it work out OK (for the soldier)?
ReplyDelete1: There's no shortage of oil, anymore than there's a shortage of water, doritos, or Arabs.
ReplyDelete2: Even if oil does runout, I'd like to ride a Horse like Matt Dillon.
3: There's more artistic genius in any random 4 chords from RATT/The Gap Band/Aeorosmith/Bon Jovi than the entire discography of the Beetles.
Frank
you guys are rockin' it... CJrun... nicely done, but i must say, I am a HUGE fan of sharia law... give me all kinds of benes.
ReplyDeleteHi again, sorry been away working - you remember that don't you? Real patients with real injuries? Anyway back to business;
ReplyDeleteFrank, will you please change the tune, you are not only boring you are repetetive, you are fast becoming/have become a cliche. Oh and your ignorant, Cate Blanchett is Australian.
CJRun, we at least try not to kill our own citizens, but hell why let a little death or two interfere with your right to show how small your dicks are by letting you walk around with big guns.
SCRN, lack of respect? Respect for what? Respect is earned and not by being the biggest bully on the planet because you have all the weapons.
Doc, thank you, at least a sensible comment. You believe what you want to but you should really read your bible, it will put you off religion for life.
Anon.,
ReplyDeleteIn all seriousness, you need to go back to whatever schools you attended and DEMAND a refund. Or, if it was in England demand the school refund to the government... I mean itself... The money it spent on you.
911DOC, Why? I honestly do not understand that comment. My spelling and grammar are correct and I understand what is happening in todays world unlike Fox news.
ReplyDeleteActually, on second thoughts I'm tired of these games. If you will just tell me why you think I am uneducated - properly mind you, not a Frank Drackman reply - I will go away.
ReplyDeletedear anon.,
ReplyDeleteyou have been educated far beyond logic. you say that reading the Bible would convince any sensible person to give up on Christianity but you seem to be a fan of Sharia law. But maybe you made the sharia law comment sarcastically....
so here's the real question... what do you believe, personally, after great thought and effort, that your friends and colleagues don't believe. my suspicion is that you all agree.
you speak like someone who has been educated far beyond their intelligence and like someone who can not entertain an independent thought or idea without making sure it's cool with the ideology of the day.
in short, you are a classic liberal, always seeking the 'middle ground', and, as it turns out, best dealt with by a snappy retort or a sharp crack to the nose.
in short, you are a pussy.
best
911 FLMAO!!! I knew that we were twin sons of different mothas' but now I think I want to have your babies!!
ReplyDeleteThank you 911DOC, however, I did not make any comments about Sharia law, someone else I'm afraid. Next time I have fun with you 'good ol boys' I will put my name to it.
ReplyDelete"Properly read, the bible is the most potent force for atheism ever concieved." - Isaac Asimov.
Try reading something by Christopher Hitchens, Sam Harris, Richard Dawkins or CJ Werleman.
Oh and if you feel up to it, come ahead and have a go at my nose because it is easy to threaten me when you are on the other side of the world.
Frank, Shut up you are an absolute dick, Americans don't understand irony, it's spelt Boer and it was only in the last century. Why do you have a war fixation? Every time you argue with a brit it comes down to what 'you' did in the war. Inferiority complex and living on past glories?
Tosser!
ReplyDeleteSorry, American tosser!
Hey you Limey Bugger-er
ReplyDeleteEven a broken cliche's right 2 times a day...
And I'd be a uptight prick too if I had to be subject to the whims of some inbread Royal Family.
And I'm not sayin I hate all thangs English, I'll write "Laudanum" or "Paracetomol" every so often just to keep the PACU nurses on their toes.
But since most of em hail from the Former Yugoslavia/one of the various "Stan" countries/India it flys right over there pretty little heads with the red dot in the middle...
And whats so great about that Stevin Hawkins guy? I'd be smart too if I was in a wheelchair 24-7.
and I've been told I'm obnoxious and lazy, uneducated, any my opinion means nothing, and thats just my Mom...
so you'll have to do better than that Mr. Bond... seriously, he's the best you got, some effete tea sipping sissy who couldn't lift Mr. T's nutsack.
Oh yeah, Princess Diana was a S-word
Frank
Shit 911, you've blocked me. How sad is that? What are you afraid of? OK I will post this anonymously but put my name at the bottom.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, back to my comment.
911,Frank, CJRun, SCRN et al, if you do not want people commenting why not make the blog private so that only those invited to comment can do so? Why do you seem to prefer Frank's non sequiturs, ad hominem attacks and nonsense to honest reasonable debate? If someone disagrees with you, get over it and answer sensibly or ignore it, but continual abuse is just childish. As is threats of personal violence over several thousand miles.
I got interested in this thread because I had a friend who in the mid 1980's had one of those fixators applied as he had a short leg following a fall from a cliff as a child. What could have been an interesting discussion was spoiled by talk of god (I'm an atheist), anti British sentiment and Franks usual crap.
Ah, I've just realised, you hate Frank too that's why he has to comment anonymously.
GrumpyRN
i have not blocked anyone, grumpyRN.frank is not blocked, you are not blocked, hell, if i was going to block anyone it would be CannedAm but she can post anytime. if there is some problem on your end it has not been generated from my end, or, if you get some message that says you are blocked let me know and i'll see if i can fix it.
ReplyDeleteand honestly, you get upset when God is mentioned? really? no wonder you are grumpy.
911, pretty sure she's a she, and she's CannedAm. The one who blames all medical folks for her nothing life.
ReplyDeleteCannedAm, you couldn't make it as a nurse. You would be eaten alive. Now, off you go. Run quick, quick like a bunny off to Starbucks to meet your BFFs.
-SCRN
"Grumpy RN" jeez, talk about the Sterotypes...
ReplyDeleteYour even worse than my Dad, and it wasn't till highschool I realized "stingyjew" wasnt a real word...
and why are RN's so grumpy? they earn decent money, work indoors, and no Soul-eating residency training right in the middle of your peak sexual performance years...
and if your vagina's got even Steven Hawkins level muscle tone, you've got a good chance of hookin up with someone with real earning potential.
Like a CRNA.
but if I had a snatch with more toxins than the original "Love" canal, a Uterus more baren than the Gobi desert, and breasts droopier than the S&P 500, I'd be an A-hole, I mean A-theist too.
Frank
On the other hand, I don't know about any of these things but that just looks amazing to me. Truly amazing.
ReplyDeleteSpent a year in Iraq as a combat medic, didn't bring a pint of oil back with me.
ReplyDeleteThrew a few tourniquets on blown up legs, and now I have my Masters degree and I'm a first year medical student. Also recovered about 25 old British tombstones from a rural community west of Baghdad, funny, the Brits that came to retrieve them seemed pretty happy we were doing our jobs.
Also, they didn't fly in just to pick up those stones - your boys are there too. Did the war help your gas prices as much as they helped ours!?
P.S. I heard that Afgani oil is worth an extra 50 horsepower!
ArmyAnon
dear last anonymous,
ReplyDeletethank you for your service, God bless you, and welcome back.
Loved what I did and hoping I made the right choice by "steppin' it up to the big leagues"!
ReplyDeleteSure tired of all this biochem though...
ArmyAnon
biochem... so useful in clinical practice. embryology too. go do great things and don't let the stupid fuckstick admin weenies ruin it for you. whatever you choose to do, make yourself indispensable and they can't fuck with you as much. Specialty surgeons are still kings of their castles. Just sayin'... ACEP has failed ER docs but maybe that will change. Hooah (or Oorah, or Hooyah, or whatever the Air Force says), but I think you are a Hooah!
ReplyDelete