As far as I can tell right now MDOD is breaking this story worldwide. Based on the same depth of analysis and hard evidence that you will soon read in any number of "reputable" news sources, I am hereby blaming the flooding in Iowa, and specifically at the University of Iowa, on George W. Bush and Republicans and Global Warming, Climate Change, or Global Cooling, or mouse farts.
After a record breaking winter with snowfall in excess of anything seen in decades, I now hate myself for driving a truck. I am now purchasing carbon credits and a prius. I can't quite get how this is a result of global warming, so I am retreating to 'climate change', but I do know, deep in my heart, that it is GWB's fault. I hope and meditate that Al Gore can get up there soon.
Gaia, please forgive us. Off to repair the ozone hole and throw urine on people with fur coats.
And dear readers, please do forward any links to sources that claim this scoop. We started it HERE! Interviews with major media outlets will be granted on a first come, first served basis. I'm hoping for NPR.
After a record breaking winter with snowfall in excess of anything seen in decades, I now hate myself for driving a truck. I am now purchasing carbon credits and a prius. I can't quite get how this is a result of global warming, so I am retreating to 'climate change', but I do know, deep in my heart, that it is GWB's fault. I hope and meditate that Al Gore can get up there soon.
Gaia, please forgive us. Off to repair the ozone hole and throw urine on people with fur coats.
And dear readers, please do forward any links to sources that claim this scoop. We started it HERE! Interviews with major media outlets will be granted on a first come, first served basis. I'm hoping for NPR.
Mouse farts?
ReplyDeleteAs in the farts that come out of a mouse or a human that mistook a mouse for a gerbil and "exhaled" the little bugger with the flatulence?
Cow farts have to be worse.
Gore farts, well, from the look on his face, he's been holding something in for a while. :-)
As long as you are breaking wind, I mean weather news, what will the weather be like next month? Should I be prepared for rain on July 4th?
It would be nice to know.
the weather for the next few months will be mostly hot with scattered thunderstorms and tornados across middle america. towards the end of september, and without apparent reason, the heat will break and cool wether will return. i would not be at all surprised if in 5-6 months, especially at higher elevations, there will be snow. this too is the fault of the republicans.
ReplyDeletealso, and soon, there will be a heat wave that will break record high temperatures in some states. also, in some states, new record low temperatures will be recorded.
the southern hemisphere will experience, AT THIS SAME TIME, cold weather.
the world is ending .
So this is the impending doom that all of my patients talk about, well maybe not all of them, We had one survive last week. :-)
ReplyDeleteBack from vacation and glad to see the FCC has not shut you down. ;-)
ReplyDeleteEven if you were serious, you could not drive a Prius, you are *not* Prius material: you probably eat real meat instead of soja burgers, don't own a pair of birkenstocks and... do you even recycle?
O the horror.
"O the horror"?
ReplyDeleteIs this the beginning to an epic poem or an Ode?
Happy Father's Day to everybody who reproduced on purpose.
ReplyDeleteI didn't intentionally reproduce, thought I needed at least another decade of maturity, but becoming a father was the best thing to happen to me.
ReplyDeleteGenerally, I hide the maturity. :-)
I think we now have only one recourse to save the world: Sacrifice Gore on an altar to Gaia. Only he is pure enough to satisfy Her wrath.
ReplyDeleteWhy stop at sacrificing Gore on an alter. Let's sacrifice him to the great hungry god of the north, the polar bear. I mean it's the least he could do after filming one drowning and not jumping in to rescue it.
ReplyDeleteJust remember people, together we can make a difference.
I don't know if anyone's read this, but a recent work was published in Nature that debunks a huge point that many climate change models were based upon. Part of the faulty modeling bases climate changes over the millenia on differences "read" from tree rings. These differences were based on the premise that the inside temperature of plant parts reflected the outside temperature of their environment. Come to find out, with some nifty actual scientific measurements, temperatures inside tree leaves are a cool 71 F. Uniformly. Across the globe and different climactic zones. I can get the link from my husband if anyone wants it.
Really people. We are not changing the climate. Talk about the biggest hoax in history. There is no consensus among scientists, no matter how many people scream it and chant the mantra. It doesn't make something true. It's just the new religion, and the new attempt to trap countries into global government. And also very profitable to sheisters like Al Gore.
I would rather buy crack for crackheads than buy a carbon credit.
I predict every 2008 Hurricane will only hit States carried by George Bush in 2004.
ReplyDeleteto the douchebag who linked a youtube video. really, you know this is not the place to convince anyone of the evils of republicans. there's lots of other places for you. why not go there?
ReplyDeleteYou can do better than that - threaten the states with hurricanes, tornadoes, earthquakes, boll weevils, gypsy moths, maple syrup blight, if they don't vote the way you want them to.
ReplyDeleteFire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling!
Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes...
The dead rising from the grave!
Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!
This chick at my work was wearing a button with "W" with a slashy mark through it yesterday. (ie Anti-George Bush) I think it's inappropriate to wear anything like that at work, but whatever.
ReplyDeleteI asked her if that button matched her pantsuits. She got pissed.
this is delicious.
ReplyDeleteApparently life is even getting hard for the "beautiful" doctors.
ReplyDeletehttp://erstories.net/?p=389
This chick at my work was wearing a button with "W" with a slashy mark through it yesterday.
ReplyDeleteMaybe she doesn't like the letter W.
How did you find out about the Daily Mail article?
ReplyDeleteThis is too good.
That article is just too good.
ReplyDeleteWe're all wondering how Ted Turner's fathers' day went.
.
ReplyDeleteAnother question: where is erdoc85 and what have you done with him? Or is this a question for DRX?
85 is on Sabbatical. One of his best sheep died and he is conducting extended auditions for a replacement...
ReplyDeleteJust curious, did anyone else notice the absence of Rev. Jesse and Al Sharpton in Iowa? Hmmmmm.... Just saying...
ReplyDeleteRETRACTION:
ReplyDeleteevidently the devastation in IOWA is already off the radar of the MSM. i am perplexed and angry that GWB has not yet been blamed for this. i can not figure this out. i wonder if i looked at the demographics of iowans if i could get some idea... well, never mind.
AND HERE IT IS.
ReplyDeleteOr it suggests that people are bad at math and do not know how to comprehend that on a scale of millions of years, the coincidence of these floods is not really alarming. Bad math, evil perspective, it makes our problems seem as if they are not the most important thing EVER - right after the election, that is. :-)
ReplyDeleteYou are both a doctor and an extremely gifted seer. We must build a temple to please you, so that you may prevent another of these disasters. A very expensive exercise in futility and stupidity. As one of the first to recognize your powers of prediction, I shall go forth and preach to the Den of Iniquity - Congress must listen. Fire! Brimstone! Floods! Humidity!
dear RogueMedic,
ReplyDeletesince you have pleased the great oracle of MDOD i will offer this...
in the next month there will be many lightning strikes particulary in the midwest and south. golfers are in particular danger so beware! also in the next two months areas of our country will suffer drought while others get above average rainfal.
the seer has spoken.
Thank you, Oh Great One.
ReplyDeleteIt is good that I melted down my golden golf clubs to make a larger than life golden Snidely Whiplash. :-)
A call to end (some) global warming:
ReplyDeleteWhereas eating beans produces flatulence, and much more than mouse farts;
Whereas flatulence is partly methane, a greenhouse gas 20 times more dangerous than carbon dioxide (and explosive under the right conditions!);
Whereas beans are unregulated and being sold AT THIS MOMENT in stores everywhere;
Whereas we cannot just ban beans, because poor bean farmers would starve;
Therefore:
We call for every consumer to buy beans and bury them in the back yard, mitigating the threat. We suggest 1 lb per week.
Remember: Bury carbon, don't eat it.